Parenting is hard. Everyone has their own ideas, customs, and rules, but there’s no one right way to raise kids. However, many Reddit users had strong opinions about this mom’s decision to stop cuddling her daughter.
The mom shares her perspective
The 37-year-old woman went on Reddit’s ‘Am I The A*****e’ thread to share what happened with her young daughter. “She’s really small for her age, so sometimes people treat her like she’s younger,” the woman explained. “She likes cuddling with me or my husband on the couch or in a chair,” she said. But lately, she’s been thinking maybe her daughter is getting “too big” for cuddling like that, and she’s worried it might not be good for her.
The day before she wrote her post, the 11-year-old daughter tried to sit on her mom’s lap for a cuddle. “I told her she was too big for that and to get off,” the mom said. “She got really upset, got off, and went to her room, slamming the door.” Now, the girl wasn’t trying to cuddle anymore, and there was tension at home after the incident. “She doesn’t talk to me unless she has to, and when I hugged her goodnight last night, she didn’t hug me back,” the mom explained. “I feel really bad because I hurt her feelings, but I still think she might be too big for sitting on my lap,” she added, asking other Reddit users if she was wrong in the situation.
What did the internet say?
Unfortunately, many people on the internet labeled the woman as “the a*****e” in this situation. They criticized her for missing out on precious bonding moments with her daughter. Overall, her story didn’t go over well with readers.
“Pretty soon, she won’t want to cuddle much. Maybe just a year left. You’re wasting that time instead of enjoying it,” one person said.
Another said, “It’s okay to guide your child toward more grown-up behaviors or say when something doesn’t feel right for you anymore. That’s part of helping them grow. But you should guide them to what’s okay instead (because they need to learn, they don’t know automatically) and reassure them that even though your relationship is changing, your love for them stays the same.
“If you just told her to ‘Get off’ without warning, it’s no surprise she felt rejected and is now confused about what kind of affection is okay or not,” they added.
Another comment mentioned, “I work in a nursing home. Every week, a 78-year-old man comes to see his 99-year-old mom. She has dementia, but when they hug, they both light up. You never stop needing love and affection from your parents.”
What would you do if you were the mom in this situation? Any advice for her? Share in the comments!